You’ve likely stumbled across this post because you’ve gotten an amazing job offer or you’ve heard that you can find work in a new place and you are wondering if you should move for a job. My husband and I moved for work and I’ve outlined our experience here.
Should I move for a job?
Short answer: HECK YES.
Medium-length answer: If you are single and you have nothing holding you back, HECK YES.
Long answer: Well. Let’s get started, shall we?
I love living in Minnesota–I genuinely love it. (You can read about our first year.) But it’s hard AF being away from family with a little child. That’s essentially the biggest issue.
When we moved here, I was pregnant and we both work(ed) remote. (I’ve since resigned). I know what you’re thinking—we get this question ALL THE TIME. If you both work(ed) from home, then why did you move??????
We moved because he covers the MN territory. He visits partners all over MN, SD, and ND. He does leave to go to meetings frequently, but he doesn’t leave to go to an office. His office is in the home.
Our personalities and socializing
I am an introvert, so I don’t really need the face-to-face interaction. Sure, I miss family and friends, but we are fortunate to go home pretty often and I get to catch up with them when we visit. I do miss the occasional meet up with friends, but I have a kid now anyway. I’d imagine our hang outs would be few and far between.
On the other hand, my husband is an extrovert. I think the distance bugs him more. I think he gets the itch to socialize a lot more than I ever will. He’ll sometimes go check the mail in hopes the neighbors are outside. He doesn’t think I notice—but I do.
I think that my husband misses home more than I do, so if you are a social person, you may want to figure out how to make friends and fast.
Fun fact: my husband and I are polar opposites. He’s an ESFP and I’m an INTJ. I think that is why we work so well together.
Kids and being far from family
It’s really hard having a little baby and being really far from family. When my daughter was around a month old, my husband had to leave for work for about a week. Then two weeks later he had to leave AGAIN for another week. It was fine, but it’s strange not having that sense of security knowing someone is only a phone call away. (She’s now 9 months old– read more.)
Just the other day, my husband had to travel again, and I realized I was far away from home without the proper license plates on my car. I rehearsed what I’d say to a police officer if I was pulled over. I was worried my car would get towed. If I got pulled over, I would have had literally no one to call. In the middle of a Minnesota winter, with a young baby, that is the last thing I want to happen.
I also get a little jealous when my husband travels. He’s going to Dallas, Vancouver, and Vegas all over the next 6 months and I can’t go with him because of the babe. Though I wouldn’t change a thing, I’m trying to prove a point that if you move for work, you might want to wait on the family planning.
I love it here though, it’s really great and I hear the schools are amazing. There’s more opportunity out here for our little babe. I don’t know if we’ll stay here forever, but I wouldn’t mind if we did. I would love for my daughter to have the best education possible.
I’d hold off on the pets too. We needed to search for a house and not an apartment– and we had to make sure the house had a fence. Just more things on a checklist when moving. Our dogs also can’t be sent to a boarding place (a story for another time), so when we go back to NH we have a house sitter come and stay.
It wasn’t my favorite idea— having a stranger come in and sleep in our house while we are away, but it’s our only option. At least the person is nice. She has stayed at our house probably four times now and we like her. It’s just a weird thought, ya know? If we didn’t have pets we wouldn’t be spending any money on having a house guest every so often.
TLDR; should you move for a job?
There are pluses and minuses to our move. My only advice would be to wait until you have roots in a new place to have kids. We’ve made it work this far– it is possible and I wouldn’t change a thing. It’s been a challenge we’ve had to overcome while my husband advances his career, but the move was well worth it.
I think it’s worth taking the plunge— and hey, you can always move back.