Things I’m good at: Sticking my foot in my mouth.
I can’t tell you why I do this, just sometimes things come out that I shouldn’t say and most likely don’t mean. It’s word vomit. I only realize how dumb and rude they were after I say them.
I seriously never mean them to sound as bad as they are. They have a different meaning in my head and my intention wasn’t to hurt anyone’s feelings.
Disclosure: Some of the links below in this article are affiliate links. At no additional cost to you, I can earn a commission if you click through the links and purchase something. Thanks for supporting my little family! We appreciate it!
It was worse when I was younger before I started dating my now husband. He’s helped me fine tune my words. When I first started dating him I vividly remember insulting two of his family members within 5 minutes—completely by accident of course. I hope since then they’ve forgotten, but just know I haven’t.
My husband has spent many years giving me the, “why would you say that?!” look. Helping me realize I need to think before I speak.
The reason I am telling you this was because I realized something important after my latest foot-in-mouth incidence.
So, if your name rhymes with SMECCA or SHMANDA please don’t tell your mom about this post. If she reads it, fine, but I don’t want to remind her about the unintentional rude thing I said. When I say these stupid regretful things, I just hope no one remembers it as well as I do.
For Christmas, my mother-in-law got this awesome [air fryer]. It’s stainless steel and resembles a toaster oven. Our [air fryer] doesn’t look the same. It’s this large, rounded, black machine that doesn’t fit well on the counter. I started comparing her air fryer to ours and insulting our air fryer in the process.
Boy would I not shut up about how it’s an “eye-sore”. I didn’t really mean it, it’s just that hers fits in her kitchen better. Meanwhile my husband was giving me that look and frantically flailing his arms while his mom could not see him. I was too busy shitting on our air fryer to notice his desperate need to get my attention.
When I finally realized why he was trying to stop me, the blood drained from my face and my hands went cold and clammy.
I shot my husband a text.
DAMN I AM GOING TO HELL.
I’m sure you’ve caught on by now—my mother-in-law bought us the freakin’ air fryer. YAY BRIANA. GOOD JOB. GOLD STAR. PROUD OF YOU.
*I literally just sighed reliving this experience*.
Now—let me tell you this is where I explain how I didn’t really mean it. I just was beyond impressed by how beautiful her air fryer is that I felt like I needed to put down mine. But that doesn’t really matter. It doesn’t matter what ours looks like, it only matters that it makes the food taste good. I tuck it away when we’re not using it, because I hate counter clutter anyway. If I had her air fryer, I’d probably tuck it away too. That’s totally fine. It’s a perfectly great air fryer. Hers can be great all by itself and I don’t need to compare it to mine.
I then realized something about myself—I do this a lot! I’ll put down myself or whatever it is I’m talking about to make the other thing seem better! We don’t need to compare and put down the other comparable subject.
“Wow! Your hair looks great! I need to cut mine.” Or “You’ve lost so much weight! I need to stop eating these cookies!” WE DON’T NEED TO DO THAT. WE DON’T NEED TO PUT OURSELVES DOWN TO RAISE SOMEONE ELSE UP. It doesn’t have to work like that! I promise.
It’s funny that talking about an air fryer made me realize this important lesson. If you didn’t notice when I wrote it in caps in the last paragraph, I’ll say it one last time:
We don’t need to put ourselves down to raise someone else up.
If you need me, I’ll be losing sleep about all the dumb foot-in-mouth experiences I’ve had throughout the years.