This birthday isn’t a big one, but this past year was the year of “realizing stuff”. Don’t hate me for referencing KUWTK. I was a long time hater, until I had nothing to watch when I was nursing 24/7 during my maternity leave. Now, I want to be
adopted by Kris Jenner. Okurrrrr.
Reflecting in this past year, I’ve learned a lot about myself with the help of my daughter. She’s almost one, stay tuned for her one year update in a few days! She has opened my heart, not only to her, but she’s opened my heart to let go of my past and take in new experiences.
Wait, I’m the parent now
I have a new view of the adults that were in my life when I was young. When I was a kid, I thought the adults had all the answers. Now, I’m in their shoes. I have a young child and I’m THEIR AGE. I don’t know everything. They didn’t know everything. One person who had a large influence in my life screwed up a little—for lack of a better phrase. But now that I have a young child, I can empathize with the actions of this individual, even though I don’t support their choices. I know this was super vague, but I can’t air all the dirty laundry! You gotta wine and dine me first.
This same person isn’t in my life anymore and hasn’t been for a long time. But, I used to fear the rare days where we’d cross paths. I didn’t fear them like the monster under the bed, I just didn’t know how to “be” around them. There was too much turmoil, so naturally I hid in my turtle shell. Now, I’ve realized I no longer fear this person and I’d happily say hello if I saw them. Big changes.
Also, our big move to Minnesota has made me cherish the relationships I left back in NH. I used to take them for granted.
Goals for this new year
- Run a 10k.
- Finally open my Etsy shop.
- Stop half-assing stuff. This one needs explaining. I “half-do” a lot of things. For example, I take my shoes off when I come in. Then they travel to the stairs. Then they collect dust on the floor of my bedroom. Then they finally end up back in my closet. I’m wasting time when I should just do the job right the first time. Put the dang shoes away.
- I’d like to read more, but saying simply “more” isn’t a definitive number. I want to read/listen to at least 12 books. That’s is a fair goal.
I know I sound like a broken record, but motherhood seriously has changed me for the better. However, I want to say that I don’t believe you need to be a mother to experience personal growth. I don’t want you to walk away from this rolling your eyes because I think I’m on a different page. I don’t. For me, this was the catalyst for my personal growth. That, and some good therapy sessions. Therapy helped me deal with some s*** I needed to let go of.
Sayonara bad vibes! Hello new year.